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My Opinion on the Function of Higher Education

It is hard to deny that nowadays there is a trend of utilitarianism in academic terms. Maybe it can benefit students in some ways, however, it would definitely develop into depraved values if we shut our eyes to this situation.

Students are admitted to colleges right after their college entrance examinations, under the pressure of which they are accustomed to eagerly pursuing the only one firm goal of study--the score. Even they have already attained a higher education, they are still affected by this attitude and stick to it. It's kind of sadness. Another reason why the trend arises is that the urge to achieve success corresponds with the fast pace of modern social life. Students have transformed into machines of examinations and score-makers rather than scholars and researchers. With material desire, many of them discard their devout belief of knowledge and fish for reputation and wealth, so far as to use fair means or foul.

Based on this situation, the function of higher education should arouse college students' consciousness of study. Colleges are the last promised land for study. At the mean time, they provide us with large amounts of access to unlimited knowledge. The function should encompass inspiration for academic spirit, which let the students know study is respected and sublime from its own origin. Colleges are supposed to cultivate delving talents with the sense of humanism instead of "educated barbarian" referred by Theodore Roosevelt, or education is in vain.

字数:248 提交次数:10 显示: 给老师留言  
91.5
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篇章结构:
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评语 作者句法知识扎实,但从句稍微偏少;文章衔接手法恰当;作者词汇基础扎实,拼写也很棒。
类型维度 测量值参考范围
词汇形符数271 195~230
字数248 166~208
类符数159 93~115
平均词长4.97 4.23~4.97
平均词长标准差2.63 2.19~2.62
高频词汇占比66% 77%~86%
学术词汇占比10% 2%~7%
超纲词汇占比11% 3%~8%
篇章连词1 8~14
动词短语19 7~17
段落段落数3 3~5
平均每段句数4.33 2.49~5.52
平均每段词数90.33 36.91~89.70
首段词数占比16% 12%~43%
尾段词数占比36% 6%~40%
首段句数占比15%11%~44%
尾段句数占比38% 8%~41%
句子句子数13 11~17
平均句长21 13~20
最长句词数34 21~37
最短句词数6 4~10
1~9词句子占比15% 5%~32%
10~19词句子占比31% 39%~70%
20~29词句子占比38% 6%~36%
残句数0 0~1
病句数0 0~3
从句从句总数14 9~17
从句类型5 4~6
不定式4 1~5
现在分词1 0~4
过去分词2 0~1
主语从句0 0~2
补语从句3 1~5
wh-从句4 0~4
关系从句0 0~3
词性连词3% 3%~6%
名词27% 17%~24%
动词15% 16%~22%
副词6% 5%~8%
形容词16% 15%~20%
介词17% 8%~12%
代词6% 6%~12%
标点8% 10%~14%
满分: 100
字数: 150~300
要求:The 26th American President Theodore Roosevelt once said, "If we educate a man's mind but not his heart, we have an educ
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1.1
It is hard to deny that nowadays there is a trend of utilitarianism in academic terms. [0]
  • [拓展辨析] 查看trenddirection的区别。   
    好评 报错
  • [推荐表达] nowadayscurrently   
    好评 报错
1.2
Maybe it can benefit students in some ways, however, it would definitely develop into depraved values if we shut our eyes to this situation. [0]
  • [推荐表达] ifprovided that   
    好评 报错
  • [推荐表达] somequiet a few   
    好评 报错
  • [推荐表达] howevernevertheles   
    好评 报错
  • [拓展辨析] 动名搭配 shut...eye 在语料库中出现过 275  
    SeeAlso: close eye2175,shut center15
    好评 报错
第1段
2.1
Students are admitted to colleges right after their college entrance examinations, under the pressure of which they are accustomed to eagerly pursuing the only one firm goal of study--the score. [0]
  • [拓展辨析] 动名搭配 pursue...goal 在语料库中出现过 591  
    SeeAlso: follow goal40,pursue end38,engage goal3
    好评 报错
  • [推荐表达] onlyjust/merely/barely/singly/solely/rarely   
    好评 报错
2.2
Even they have already attained a higher education, they are still affected by this attitude and stick to it. [0]
2.3
It's kind of sadness. [0]
2.4
Another reason why the trend arises is that the urge to achieve success corresponds with the fast pace of modern social life. [0]
  • [推荐表达] reasoncause/factor/contributor/trigger   
    好评 报错
  • [拓展辨析] 注意correspond withcorrespond to区别。   
    短语动词correspond with表示“通信”[exchange letters regularly]; 而短语动词correspond to表示“相当于”[equivalent to]。
    好评 报错
2.5
Students have transformed into machines of examinations and score-makers rather than scholars and researchers. [0]
  • [学习提示] 易混词汇: fairly, pretty, quite, rather 都有“相当,颇”之意。   
    fairly: 语意最弱,多用于褒义,表示适度地、尚可的意思。不可与too或比较级连用。
    pretty: 用法与rather相似。常用于非正式文体。
    quite: 含义比fairly稍强,与不定冠词连用时,一般放在不定冠词之前。
    rather: 语气比quite强,褒意贬意无可使用。可与too和比较级连用。
    好评 报错
2.6
With material desire, many of them discard their devout belief of knowledge and fish for reputation and wealth, so far as to use fair means or foul. [0]
  • [拓展辨析] 注意by farso far的区别。   
    好评 报错
  • [推荐表达] sotherefore/thus/consequently/accordingly/as a result/for that reason/hence/that’s why   
    好评 报错
  • [推荐表达] orotherwise/if not/before/or else   
    好评 报错
第2段
3.1
Based on this situation, the function of higher education should arouse college students' consciousness of study. [0]
  • [学习提示] 易混词汇: pupil, student, learner, scholar 均含“学生”之意。   
    pupil: 特指中小学生,尤其是小学生。
    student: 普通用词,可指中学生,但主要指高等学校或专科学校的学生。
    learner: 通俗用词,指某一门学问上的初学者,尤指成年的初学者。
    scholar: 可指一切学生,尤指学识渊博的某一学科的学者。
    好评 报错
  • [推荐表达] arouseignite/stimulate/spur/motivate   
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3.2
Colleges are the last promised land for study. [0]
  • [搭配错误] 请检查the last promised land,本族语中很少使用。   
    好评 报错
  • [学习提示] 易混词汇: earth, clay, dirt, land, dust, soil, mud, ground 都有“土地,土,泥”之意。   
    earth: 多指地表带有水分的泥土,较具体。
    clay: 特指潮湿时发粘,而火烤后变坚硬的泥土。
    dirt: 指地表的干松泥土。
    land: 含义笼统。指与河流、海洋相对的陆地,也指可耕种的土地。
    dust: 特指土壤干燥后,飞扬于空中的细微泥土。
    soil: 特指适宜栽种农作物或生长各种植物的泥土。
    mud: 指湿土,尤指雨后稀泥、污泥。
    ground: 通常指大地的表面,也可指土壤、泥土或场地。
    好评 报错
3.3
At the mean time, they provide us with large amounts of access to unlimited knowledge. [0]
3.4
The function should encompass inspiration for academic spirit, which let the students know study is respected and sublime from its own origin. [0]
  • [学习提示] 易混词汇: origin, source, root 均有“起源,起因,根源”之意。   
    origin: 侧重指事物的起源或由来,也指人的出身。
    source: 本义指某地系河流或瀑布的源头,引申指某事的来源出处,但更多指抽象事物的根源或来源。
    root: 通常指事物产生的原因或根源。
    好评 报错
3.5
Colleges are supposed to cultivate delving talents with the sense of humanism instead of "educated barbarian" referred by Theodore Roosevelt, or education is in vain. [0]
  • [推荐表达] orotherwise/if not/before/or else   
    好评 报错
  • [拓展辨析] 动名搭配 cultivate...talent 在语料库中出现过 33  
    SeeAlso: train talent8,work talent5
    好评 报错
第3段
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  • 开始时间:2016-11-21 00:00:00
  • 截止时间:2016-12-07 23:59:00
  • 满分: 100
  • 字数: 150~300
  • 批改方式:系统多次性+教师一次性批改
  • 批改公式:

题目:My Opinion on the Function of Higher Education

要求:

The 26th American President Theodore Roosevelt once said, "If we educate a man's mind but not his heart, we have an educated barbarian."  A real educated man should fall in love with the humanities.  The term "educated barbarian" is not self contradictory. 


Nowadays there is a sad truth that a lot of college students are "educated barbarians" who have received years of education but ended up having no affection for knowledge, especially the branches in liberal arts. Staying in college solely for pragmatic purposes, they are never truly involved in knowledge. 


Write a composition based on the above information, expressing your opinion on the function of higher education. You should write at least 150 words but no more than 300 words.